Reflective technique of listening Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 750 words

Reflective technique of listening - Essay Example The writer then goes on to explain empathy as the listener’s desire to understand the internal frame of mind of the speaker. The author explains the concept very well by giving examples of how empathy can be shown by saying phrases like â€Å"I follow you†; â€Å"I am with you†. He explains acceptance as accepting the person for what he is and not trying to judge him. It is closely related to empathy. When a person doesn’t try to judge the speaker; the speaker is encouraged to speak freely and discuss all aspects of the problem that he has been facing. Congruence is explained as being in the same external frame as you are internal. If you are angry, the writer feels it is better to tell the speaker than to show false sympathy as the speaker can always guess whether your concern is genuine or not. Concreteness is defined as the ability of the listener to focus on specifics rather than vague generalities and ideas. The listener should encourage the speaker t o be more specific in order to help him reach the root cause of this problem. The speaker may be trying to avoid it.In reflection, the listener should attempt to clarify and restate what the speaker is saying. I will not only assure the speaker that you are paying attention to what you are saying but will also clear your thoughts and help you to understand the speaker in a better way. Listening orientation and reflective listening are said to be mutually re-enforcing by the writer. One feeds on the other and helps the other to grow.... Congruence is explained as being in same external frame as you are internally. If you are angry , the writer feels it is better to tell the speaker than to show false sympathy as the speaker can always guess whether your concern is genuine or not. Concreteness is defined as the ability of the listener to focus on specifics rather than vague generalities and ideas. The listener should encourage the speaker to be more specific in order to help him reach the root cause of his problem. The speaker may be trying to avoid it. In reflection the listener should attempt to clarify and restate what the speaker is saying. I will not only assure the speaker that you are paying attention to what you are saying but will also clear your thoughts and help you to understand the speaker in a better way. Listening orientation and reflective listening are said to be mutually re-enforcing by the writer. One feeds on the other and helps the other to grow. The listener should try to react to only personal comments made by the speaker such as â€Å"I am worried about the job†. Instead of focusing on how is job is; reflective listening encourages the listener to focus on the worried part. Reflective listening basically lets the speaker take ownership of the problem. So the writer says that the listener should never try to lead the conversation but should only respond whenever necessary. These responses should be limited and should only be there to encourage the speaker to continue speaking. The most important aspect of reflective listening mentioned by the writer is to acknowledge; understand and respond to the feelings of the speaker rather than the actual content of what he is